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The latter issue was circumvented here by announcing who was going to be performing in advance. Nevertheless, you didn't have to be one of those people who thinks Coldplay are the cloven-hoofed musical emissaries of satan himself to have been slightly concerned about how appropriate a booking they were. On one hand, they are one of the biggest bands in the world — a suitably global success for a global event — they stir vast stadiums full of people for a living, and it is a churlish character that claims they are anything other than very good at it. On the other, the key piece of music at the Paralympic opening ceremony — the track that seemed to hit on something vital about the Games to come — was Orbital and the Graeae Theatre Company's retooling of Ian Dury's Spasticus Autisticus, a song that is brutal, startling, furious and many other things that Coldplay's music are not. Thanks to their ubiquity on TV soundtracks — tinkling away as someone departs The X Factor or the DIY SOS tells their tragic back story — a lot of their songs have become musical shorthand for "oh, isn't it a pity", designed to elicit sympathy for whoever is on screen. The Paralympics have incited a vast array of emotions in viewers, but pity isn't among them, as anyone who caught a glimpse of the frankly terrifying wheelchair rugby will attest. There was a lot of stuff with fire and steampunk costumes, rusty vehicles cannibalised from old cars and farm machinery and people pretending to be crows on stilts.